...In which our heroine is very merry.

Sterling-Cooper-Draper-Price, Wilford Brimley cat, Opus, and I wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas. If you haven't bought it already, don't worry about it. I'll be looking forward to the annual viewing of Love Actually tomorrow and watching my grandma get all giggly after one glass of wine.

...In which our heroine itemizes.

Currently:
On my couch, in this sixty degree house because my parents refuse to turn the heat up.
Letting a nail color called "vodka and caviar" dry on my nails.
Watching Teen Mom and thanking all that is for those 28 little pills being easily obtainable.
Being thankful to MTV for at least showing the reality of unprotected teenage sex - all of the girls admitted to not using protection.
Sitting under my mom's leopard print Snuggie, that despite the fact that it's a Snuggie and a joke, is quite warm.
Dreading the doctor tomorrow. Every time I'm home, it's a must. I should probably get one in Chicago.
Ruminating on a situation that definitely qualifies as scandalous behavior, but still not feeling bad about it.
Flashing back to Recess and the Ashleys saying "SCANDALOUS!"
"When they're young, they're green."
Deciding if I need any other Christmas gifts and wondering what spirits to purchase from the Party Source.
Eating a no-bake cookie, wanting some hot chocolate, made with whole milk.
Realizing I probably won't see any friends until Saturday :(
Wondering if Avatar and the gorgeous 3-D effects will a. usher in a new era of filmmaking; b. do monster Christmas business; c. ever realize how similar to Ferngully it is.
Liking it nonetheless, despite a really bad script.
Smiling at this, a lot -

...In which our heroine wraps things up.

Yesterday was: red and fuzzy, from a new sweater.
The best batch of biscuits and gravy I've ever made.
My Production II teacher still hating my final film. Me not giving a shit and accepting the B from that class.
Dancing with Heidi to "Lovefool" while we made breakfast for dinner.
Hugging everyone profusely.
Turning from a sophomore to a junior. 
The end of another era.
Brainstorming about Big Art.
Walking home with the object of affection. Talking about Mad Men, specifically Joan.
Talking about high school drinking. Laughing at my roommate, drunk for the first time.
Cheeks flushed red from being cold, standing over a hot stove, and being infatuated, all at different times.
A cryptic message from a boy at 4AM that I gave only a hazy, semi-conscious response to. 
Watching classmates role cigarettes in rainbow papers during class.
Talking about important things, like which Pokemon is the cutest (Dratini).
Finding out your RA also had a Dolly Parton Barbie as a child. 
One of those wonderful days, where you sit back and smile and forget about all the horrible things because you're just happy that there are people in your life you love, and who love you back.

...In which our heroine is no hunter, strictly a gatherer.

Exciting finds from that contraption they call the internet:

Philip Glass and Sesame Street. Oh yes. This is saved for a point and time that I'll appreciate it more.


44 Inch Chest, from the writers of the most excellent Sexy Beast.


If you aren't reading Ugliest Tattoos on a regular basis, you should be.

I'm so not hip enough for the year end lists over at Pitchfork. -50 hipster points!

I am, however, too hip for Rolling Stone's best albums and songs of the decade. Just because Bob Dylan released an album this decade doesn't mean you have to put it on the list.

Quentin Tarantino presents his favorite films of the year: I only agree with #2 and #8.

Lots of wonderful True Blood casting news. Yeah, it's trashy TV, but it's well-done trash.

Five word film reviews: An Education - Beautiful. Lovely. Unconventional. Nostalgic. Accurate.
A Serious Man - Directionless. Dark. Funny. Minor Coens.

A round-up of year-end film lists. I still need to see A Single Man, Up in the Air, Avatar, and Precious, although I'm not so excited about the last one. I really really really would love it if Kathryn Bigelow won Best Director for The Hurt Locker. 

According to the Myers-Briggs personality test, I'm an INFJ, the rarest of all personality types. Tell me this doesn't describe me. 


And finally, if you need a Christmas gift for me, look no further. I'd appreciate delivery of said item by either Seth Rogen, Jim James, or Christina Hendricks, but just if it isn't too much of a hassle. 

Yeah, it was kind of like this when Cassie and I saw them:

...In which our heroine returns to proper form.

Let's ramble, shall we?

I just saw a delightfully adorable photo of a Boston Terrier in a Santa Hat. It never ceases to amaze me how I can draw equal pleasure from both zombies gnawing on human flesh or a cute baby animal. That makes me nostalgic for Odin's Word, and thinking of Cute Overload. I've been adhering to Sylvia Plath's wisdom lately of taking baths so hot you can only edge in one foot at a time. I don't understand - I hate being hot any other time, but I love hot baths. Last night it was hot to the point that I almost made myself pass out. I listened to "Nights in White Satin" in the dark bathroom and thought wintery thoughts. As much as I hate hate hate Christmas music, I'll listen to "Last Christmas," yes that "Last Christmas" by Wham! any day of the year. Heidi read my tarot cards in several variations tonight which never ceases to amuse me. I don't believe in god, but for some reason I listen to some colorful pieces of cardboard. I got the death card in every reading, which is actually not so bad. The words attached are things like "rebirth, new beginnings, desire, moving on."Another book she has talked about how the power card for Scorpios is death is not the end, but only a chance for resurrection. And somehow death is tied to Scorpios because we're the most sexual of the zodiac, to which the only connection I can make one Neil Gaiman short story talks about how the French call an orgasm la petite morte: the little death, and I suppose they're mostly right. I always liked that phrase or the other French phrase Mr. Gaiman taught me, l'espirit d'escaliers, the spirit of the staircase, meaning you remember the exact right thing to say as soon as you leave the party. I've had many of those nights. Tonight I ate an all-time Hall of Fame Chipotle burrito that had the perfect amount of corn salsa, but just a little too much cheese. John, it's a nice thought that you're telling me all I need is love right now, but terribly impractical. BUT, my finals are nearly done. I put finishing touches on my film today, and I'm a mere sound mix away from never having to shoot another film on a Bolex, although they are very cool cameras. Someone told me Columbia got the very last shipment of VHS tapes, in addition to owning the very last Bolexes. That "exes" looks weird in the last sentence. As people talk about Tiger Woods and Brian Kelley, I realize how little I care about sports. This shouldn't be a surprise, but then again, I haven't seen a movie in theaters in two months, which seems insane for a film major. The Cranberries on shuffle, the song takes me to 1995, Q102, Target parking lot, holding my new stamp shoe Barbie. Emily and I have been binging on 90s music this whole fall, crap from our childhoods that isn't any good, like Third Eye Blind, but then again neither is 80s music and I love that. I've been exploring Tumblr accounts lately - they start frequently with "fuck yeah" and end with "Christina Hendricks," or "beards," or my personal favorite, "beards and bacon." It never ceases to amaze me how much time people spend on the internet, because I know how much time I spend, which is too much, and they spend far more. In seven days, I will be a junior in college. I was at Big Art last night, and Joe told me to stay in college forever, and I nodded, smiled, because he is so damn cute and not nineteen. A man, not another silly boy. Motorhead, alright shuffle, I see we're behaving badly tonight. Skip. Now "Material Girl." Yes, Madonna, I'll listen to this garbage because it reminds of MTV clip specials I watched back when they still played music, and I still played Barbies.

Leah in Production II is using this in her final film. Gave me chills when she showed a rough cut.

ED. NOTE - Fixed "Least Christmas" back to the proper "Last Christmas." I think that was a Freudian blogger slip for actually talking about Wham! in a non-ironic context.

...In which our heroine gives a gift.

A confession, dear readers; I've turned into quite a nice little feminist this semester. Through learning that the true definition of feminism is simply "equal treatment for both men and women," my domestic violence writing class, Culture Race and Media, and some very snarky male film majors, I've become much more assured in my abilities as a woman, and the flawed portrayals of women that the media presents.
This is my final paper for said domestic violence writing class, and one I promised to share with Quarternotelife, posted here because it is still her birthday my time. This is a gift you've helped me work on for years -I feel like this is the paper the two of us spent a childhood researching as we shrieked and giggled in her dark basement. We'd make good case studies about the women who love horror films, and the effects that viewing violence from a young age has. Be warned though, it is fairly academic as I try to be all edumacated and stuff...

Virgins Live, Sluts Die, and the Final Girl Always Wins: The Role of Women in Horror Films
We've all seen it – a scantily clad young woman runs through a house, stalked by a masked killer. Her chest and breasts heave under a tight shirt as she flees the killer, often portrayed as hyper-masculine. Often times, as much focus is placed on what the woman is wearing as the amount of danger she is in. Also common is that this woman has been shown as the “slut” throughout the rest of the film, and acts of violence often accompany acts of sexual expression. Look to any of the major money-making horror franchises – Friday the 13^th, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Halloween – and you will find that women are objectified, hyper-sexualized, and meet violent, brutally gory ends. A more disturbing thought then is that a large portion of the audience for these films is young males – what messages do they receive about the effect of violence on women, especially women who express their sexuality. Horror films can be cheaply made, and produce healthy profits, making them a great investment for film producers (Clover 18). Thus, horror films are here to stay, but what exactly do they say about violence towards women? Perhaps more interestingly than the culture of violence they promote, what do horror films say about women in positions of power, such as Ellen Ripley in the Alien films (Stephens)? Or, could horror films even promote feminist ideas with the centralization of a “final girl” who triumphs over horrific obstacles to escape victorious, an idea widely explored by Carol J. Clover in her book Men, Women, and Chainsaws: Gender in the Modern Horror Film (Clover). The exploration of these ideas will be the focus of this paper, as will a study of if horror films have an impact on their male viewers.
The role of sexuality of female characters in relation to the violence perpetrated against them is perhaps the most disturbing aspect of horror films. In a few major examples, the horrors that commonly exist in many horror films get a violently sexual twist on them. One of the most notorious horror films of all time, I Spit on Your Grave, was released in 1978, and featured its female protagonist being gang-raped, beaten, and left for dead by several rednecks (she ultimately extracts various forms of revenge on them including cutting off one of their penises) (I Spit On). In 1981, Sam Raimi's The Evil Dead featured one female character gets dragged through the woods before ultimately being stripped, beaten, and raped by possessed tree branches (The Evil Dead). Released several years later, Stuart Gordon's Re-Animator featured a restrained naked woman screaming in terror as a severed head performed oral sex on her (Re-Animator). Unfortunately, this trend has continued into the 1990s and 2000s: 2007's Hostel: Part II prominently featured one female character hung naked from the ceiling, gagged, and throat slit with a scythe as another woman lay below her, drawing orgasmic glee from it (Hostel: Part II). With these examples and countless others, it becomes apparent that the link between a woman's sexuality and her own death or torture is prevalent in many horror films. Earlier examples include 1978's Halloween and 1980's Friday the 13^th in which a sex act is directly followed by the murder of the female participants (Halloween, Friday the 13^th).
Women who do not exhibit their sexuality in horror films fall into the role of what Carol J. Clover calls the “final girl” (Clover 260). The final girl is often portrayed as more innocent than her other female peers, virginal, and far less sexual. Clover describes the final girl as a “double for the adolescent male... a homoerotic stand-in,” meaning that the final girl does not threaten the masculinity of the male characters within, and could easily be substituted for a male character (Clover 261). Her femininity is repressed to the point where she becomes just like the males within the film. However, Clover explains this phenomenon as actually being a feminist issue, stating that the final girl “triumphs over her the perversity of her tormentor, and in the process undergoes a change from passive acceptance to active dominance” (Clover 260). However, Clover makes no mention of the fact that in this change from passive to active, the final girl is still not allowed to be sexualized or get any pride out of the fact that she is a woman – an example of this would be of the character of Kirsty in Hellraiser, who does ultimately triumph over the evil Cenobites, but yet is left to languish in oversized t-shirts and no make-up, further relating her to her male counterparts and squashing her female characteristics (Hellraiser).
However, there are horror films that transcend both sexual violence against women as well as the final girl mythology. One of the most prominent examples would be the Alien films, featuring Ellen Ripley as a protagonist who bests her male counterparts to defeat the alien. Daniel Stephens, a horror blogger, explains how Ripley functions in the film and subverts her male co-horts: “Ripley is the strong female character who makes active judgements and survives what is trying to kill her. The male character's activity is largely passive - most die quickly, others wait for her command. It is Ripley who makes the plan to defeat the alien which works, while the 'powerless' male Captain makes bad judgements as his unsure plan fails” (Stephens 1). While it could be argued that Ripley is in face de-feminized – with her job as a lift operator, the baggy space suits she wears – it is in the second film, Aliens, when her former life as a mother is explained as she is given the chance to care for the orphaned Newt, and she is allowed to maintain a major part of her femininity that other female protagonists in horror films must relinquish (Aliens). However, the treatment of the other female characters in Aliens, two space marines, fall prey to the horror movie trap of being masculinized and even accused of being lesbians (Aliens). Another film, 2006's The Descent features a core of strong female characters who find cannibalistic creatures as they independently explore underground caves. On the surface, it appears that the women subvert the usual horror film trappings, when only two are left and trying to survive, they end up battling against each other over the infidelity surrounding one of their husbands (The Descent). Unfortunately, it is difficult to come up with a fully positive portrayal of women in horror films, and as explained, even Aliens and The Descent, which appear to be feminist horror films on the surface, fall victim to the same trappings as their genre competitors.
It becomes apparent that the horror films certainly show a skewed view of women, but what effect does this have on the viewer? Daniel Goleman explores what exactly horror films to do the viewer in his 1984 essay “Violence Against Women in Films.” For male viewers, the numbers are quite disturbing: one in three men becomes sexually stimulated when viewing acts of extreme violence towards women, while another one out of three is aroused even when the violence is non-sexual (Goleman 1). The statistics come from a 1983 survey from the American Psychological Association that also found after five days of viewing horror films and then presented with a mock rape trial, the males surveyed sided with the rapist over the rape victim (Goleman). The same effects were not drawn from test males in the group who did not watch the horror films, or even watched hardcore pornography such as Debbie Does Dallas (Goleman). Though this survey is twenty-five years old, it does present some terrifying statistics in terms of how horror films and their treatment of women affect male viewers. Feminist author Myriam Miedzian supports this idea in her essay “How Rape is Encouraged in American Boys,” and uses the same study from the American Psychological Association to conclude that of the “ two hundred and thirty five studies done over the last forty years [the idea that] viewing violence helps viewers get violent impulses out of their systems is a mistake. Viewing violence encourages violent behavior”(Miedzian 156). While statistics and facts about the exact number of men that exact violent behavior on women because they've seen violent acts against women in horror films can't be stated definitively, the evidence certainly seems that it viewing such films is not a totally innocuous act.
However, men are not the only viewers or producers of horror films. Pet Sematary, Near Dark, and American Psycho are three tremendously violent films that all feature acts of violence against women, yet were all directed, and in the case of Near Dark and American Psycho, written by women (Pet Sematary, Near Dark, American Psycho). In a New York Times article, “Taking Back the Knife: Girls Gone Gory,” lesbian author Rita Mae Brown, who wrote a satirical horror film in 1982 with The Slumber Party Massacre, states that the reason she believes horror films to be so popular amongst women is that “films in general, not just horror films, are one of the few places left for women to make progress” (Orange). The article also discusses how women can appreciate Clover's “final girl” theory as a means of feminist catharsis - “audiences love a woman who can take back the knife” (Orange). Perhaps it is for this sense of empowerment and a reclaiming of violated rights, both of mind and body, by masked killers, that makes horror films so tremendously appealing to women.

The topic of the effect of violence against women in horror films, or what exactly makes the “final girl” formula so appealing has not been studied extensively enough to draw major conclusions about the issues. What can be said however, is that the extreme and prevalent acts of violence against women in horror films do have an adverse effect on their male viewers if seen in large quantities. What can also be said is that perhaps a truly realistic portrayal of a woman in a horror film has never occurred, but then again, the media is notorious for stereotyping and making generalizations about all groups, not just women. For the time being, the final girl will continue to triumph over her male counterparts in horror films, and until female screenwriters decide to change the formula, audiences will continue to delight as she takes back the knife.

Isaac Brock is another rock star whose children I'd gladly bear -

...In which our heroine strikes a pose.

I posed for Emily's studio final a few weeks ago, and just got some of the prints back. Her concept is atypical femininity - we both agree that this is the first time that we've had more female than male friends. I really like the photos, and to me there just another stepping stone in this year's acceptance of my body, and my place as a woman in the world. Her skills as a photographer continue to improve, and these are just some of the awesome prints she's done. The ones she did of Heidi as a mother are particularly fabulous. But today you just get me, particularly highlighting the contrast between my obsession with keeping my nails done yet having some very prominent tattoos.

...In which our heroine reviews a decade.

I've been reading all sorts of end of the decade lists and thinking a lot about my choices for best films of the decade. This list tries to balance personal opinion with what I consider to be quality filmmaking. I was coming of age in the 2000s and therefore lucky enough to experience most of these films when they first came out, as opposed to hindsight on a lot of other films, so they're much more near and dear to my heart.

 I know you were eagerly anticipating my humble opinion, so without further ado -

20. Knocked Up - 2007, Judd Apatow
Say what you will about Judd Apatow and company, but there are few films I can watch over and over again. Especially comedies, so the fact that I can watch this on repeat and still laugh as well as say "aww" is impressive. I like The 40-Year Old Virgin just as much, but this premise feels more real to me.

19. Adaptation - 2002, Spike Jonze
Here's where my professional opinion outweighs the personal. I can definitely do without Nicholas Cage, but he gives a solid performance here. And from a writer's standpoint, I think this even more so than Charlie Kaufman's other entry on my list is the most clever, best written screenplay maybe ever in terms of plot structures.

18. Inglourious Basterds - 2009, Quentin Tarantino
Too soon? Maybe, but this almost made me forgive Quentin for Kill Bill. Almost. Hans Landa is a villain for the ages, and the last thirty or so minutes of this film made me sit straight up and get all nervous, which is hard to do at this point. I'll be interested to see how well this holds up on subsequent viewings.

17. In the Mood for Love - 2000, Wong Kar-Wai
We had the mood vs. plot argument in class last week, and this film is one of the few examples where I can say the mood surpasses a fairly standard plot in such a way to create a heartbreaking film. One of the most visually stunning films I've ever seen. This is how you do forbidden love, Edward and Bella.

16. Head-On -  2004, Fatih Akin
Please find this film and watch it. On the surface it's a romance about two sets of damaged goods who use each other out of convenience, but on a deeper level it deals with German/Turkish politics, the role of women in society, and what exactly love entails. Beautifully brutal.

15. Punch-Drunk Love - 2002, Paul Thomas Anderson
Paul Thomas Anderson is my favorite working filmmaker today. Everything about this film works, but   getting Adam Sandler to give a serious performance and the lush, colorful cinematography really stand out. Call it quirk, but any film that can pull off "I'm looking at your face and I just want to smash it" as a romantic line and then make it resonant is just fine with me.

14. Children of Men - 2006, Alfonso Cuaron
Good sci-fi is hard to come by these days, especially good sci-fi with something to say. Alfonso Cuaron is an interesting filmmaker, and here he combines some absolute technical marvels (those long, long tracking shots, the whole birth scene) with a bleak but beautiful scenario. Clive Owen's best role, without a doubt.

13. Wall-E - 2008, Andrew Stanton
There are Pixar films I enjoy more, yes. But in terms of plot resonance and visual storytelling - I'll never know how little ones sat through the first thirty minutes - this takes the cake. Plus Wall-E and EVA are about the cutest robots in love ever. It's the little details - when EVA gets wrapped in Christmas lights, the cricket, the way Wall-E's eyes shift when he's watching Hello Dolly! that make even the coldest hearts melt.

12. The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers - 2002, Peter Jackson
The LOTR trilogy is a perfect set of films, and an amazing technical achievement. The Two Towers is my favorite for one reason and one reason only: Helm's Deep. If it's on TV and I know it's Helm's Deep time, I'm pretty sure I'd let the house get robbed, lest I be interrupted in my nerdgasm.

11. Amelie - 2001, Jean-Pierre Jeunet
Maybe the sweetest film on this list. Wouldn't we all love an Amelie from Montemarte in our lives? My favorite thing about it though is the side characters - like the man with class bones, Nino, the couple Amelie plays matchmaker for - and the magical realism in the production design, from the color palettes to the scrapbooks she makes.

10. Y Tu Mama Tambien - 2001, Alfonso Cuaron
Naughty, naughty, naughty. I watched this far too young, but more than the sex in it, the ahem, relationship between Gael Garcia Bernal and Diego Luna as two young men whose sexuality threatens their lifelong friendship is what stuck most. The erotic factor may be what initially gets you to watch, but this is a gorgeous, tragic film. Alfonso Cuaron, please make another movie.

9. The Dark Knight - 2008, Christopher Nolan
Best comic book film ever, hands down. The most excited I've ever been to see a movie as well. I don't know what to say that hasn't been said already. I've loved Batman since I was a little one, and this is by far the most interesting cinematic rendering of its mythology. When is chapter three coming, Mr. Nolan?

8. Pan's Labyrinth - 2006, Guermillo del Toro
I like to call this "most unexpected outpouring of tears ever to happen in a movie theatre." I knew it would be sad, but this dark, gothic fairy tale is also one of the best films I've seen about what it means to be a child, and be on that brink where fantasy and reality merge just enough. Beautifully shot, beautifully written. That final shot haunts me to this day.

7. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind - 2004, Michel Gondry
The second Kaufman scripted entry on the list, this film would have failed without the touch of Michel Gondry. I love Jim Carrey in serious roles, and Kate Winslet is perfect as always as Clementine. I had to watch this twice to figure it out, which was a rare treat. Every time I watch it, I enjoy it more. The best take on modern romance of the decade? Probably, but at the very least it's the most thought-provoking.

6. Memento - 2000, Christopher Nolan

I'm so glad I've gotten to watch Christopher Nolan grow and develop as a filmmaker. This is his most well-written film, and is absolutely ingenious in its storytelling. It seems so obvious, but yet when you're watching a film play out backwards and you still don't know what's going to happen next...now there's great filmmaking.

5. Lost in Translation - 2003, Sofia Coppola
I really just need to be Sofia Coppola's BFF. Here's another example of when mood overwhelms plot, as does perfect music choice. This is Bill Murray's best role, and I love the unconsummated passion, the "above love" relationship of Charlotte and Bob. I could live inside of this film.

4. No Country for Old Men - 2007, The Coen Brothers
How do I love the Coen Brothers, let me count the ways...the violence that always lies somewhat dormant in their films finally comes to fruition in this Cormac McCarthy adaptation. Chigurh is so terrifying as a villain, and the setting of 1980s Texas shows through every dirty, dusty frame of the film. People complained about the ending, but I thought it was perfect, the way Tommy Lee Jones' sad bulldog face knew his time had finally passed.

3. A History of Violence - 2005, David Cronenberg
This is David Cronenberg's most accessible film, and one that explores the notions of family, trust, and small-town life. The bursts of extreme violence are beautifully done, as the performances by Viggo Mortensen and Maria Bello. The whole William Hurt segment is some of my favorite character interplay ever put to film. It raises the eternal question of how well we really know those closest to us, and if we did, what would we do with it. I love the ending, the subversion of the American family dinner for good.

2. There Will Be Blood - 2007, Paul Thomas Anderson
This is what an epic should be. I had visions of old Hollywood when I saw this the day it opened. Daniel-Day Lewis as Daniel Plainview gives one of the best performances I've ever seen. There is so much that is perfect about this film - Johnny Greenwood's score, Robert Elswit's cinematography, Paul Dano as Planview's foil, the oil derrick scene. Some people I know (*cough* ChemGuy) thought the ending was anti-climatic, but I didn't move for the entire last twenty minutes out of fear. Yes Daniel Plainview, you do drink my milkshake.

1. Almost Famous - 2000, Cameron Crowe
I can say with certainty there are better films on this list, but I've never seen anything I enjoy as much as this film. I just want to crawl inside of it and live there forever - it makes me nostalgic for a time I never lived through. I aspire to be Penny Lane, or at least be half as cool as she is. I remember the cold chills I got the first time watching this and "Tiny Dancer"came on, and I still get them. There's so many perfect moments of music and laughter and love in this film. Crowe really gets what it is, as band-aid Sapphire states "to truly love some silly little piece of music or band so much that it hurts."  One list I saw named this as the rom-com of the decade, but it's that and a road movie, and a rock movie, and a coming of age film.  I know the dialogue verbatim at this point. There is no doubt when watching the love for this life that Cameron Crowe has for this era - he was William after all. And if you haven't seen the vastly superior but out of print bootleg cut, please find it. The additional scenes add so, so much. It's my favorite film ever, and that's all there really is to say.

While every frame is perfect to me, I especially enjoy watching William's reactions, and how "River" comes in as Penny starts to cry when she sees Russell. I want a tackle box like hers.